Hair

I have had quite a few different hairstyles over the years, varying from the formidable bowl cut to an I-wish-I-could-do-my-hair-like-Princess-Leah type. Of course, changing hairstyles means a trip to the hairdressers, of which I have had many over the years.

I’ve look up some interesting but useless facts to do with hair for you to impress your friends with. I guarantee that when you tell them these you'll be Mr Popular.

-  The average person gets 6 haircuts a year. That means that if you live the average life-span of 72 years you would have 432 haircuts. 

- The average person grows 6 inches of hair a year. 

- The average person loses 100 hairs a day.

- The world record for the longest hair is 18 feet long. I find it hard to comprehend length, so I imagined how long three 6 foot people would be lying down in line. That's long.

I've always loved having my hair cut, since I was very young. I was always the angelic child, which was easy to play on having Philip as a brother. When we went to get our haircut, because Phil would kick up such a fuss, my mum would buy us a pack of crisps to pacify the whinging. 

'Crisps as a treat?!' you say scathingly? Well yes, my dear friend, I lived in Nepal where people look through rubbish for valuables as a job. So yes, crisps were a treat.

I've had many memories in the hairdressers. When I was 8, a new hairdressers opened in Kathmandu called 'Cinderella Beauty Parlour'. Naturally, being the blonde haired, blue eyed stereotypical little girl I was, I was hooked, and after much begging, was taken by my mother as a treat. 

Some treat it was. When we got inside, after much scrambling as I seemed to be the first customer that had entered their doors in a while, they sat me on a wooden chair, and my mother explained that I wanted a wash and cut.

"Okay, no problem" said the young woman "but we haven't got any warm water. But the cold wash will be very refreshing?" She smiled hopefully, but my mum being the savvy woman she is told her that I would just have a trim and forget the wash. 

Have you ever referred to someone as 'scissor happy'? I suggest you go to them right now and tell them that you're sorry, because you don't understand the meaning of scissor happy until you have met this woman.

She chopped away at my hair like there was no tomorrow, until finally my mother stepped in and assured her that my length was perfectly fine now, albeit slightly uneven. Then onto the fringe she went with just as much vigour, snipping away while my mother looked on with worry. The woman finally stepped back to admire her masterpiece. 

My fringe was wonky.

So wonky and short that I looked like I had been in an argument with Beth Ditto (who FYI scares the living daylight out of me.) My mother let out a cry of horror, and snatched the scissors out of the woman's hands and finished the job herself. 

That was the first and last time I ever went to Cinderella Beauty Parlour. It closed down shortly after. I wonder why...

More recently, I had an interesting experience with my current hairdresser, who comes to my house to cut my hair. She was checking to see if my hair was even, and asked me to stand up. 

As a brief introduction, I have had a history of light headedness from standing up for too long. Weird  I know. 

Anyway, there I was standing up whilst my mother was checking my hair from behind (she doesn't take chances with haircuts anymore), when I started to feel dizzy. I ignored it, but carried on feeling worse and worse, when suddenly everything started going black. 

The next thing I knew I was lying on the kitchen floor, confused. It honestly felt like I had had a really nice long sleep. I later found out I was only out for a few seconds. Fainting's weird. 

On a parting note, I love hair. Imagine if there was no such thing as hair? We'd all look pretty egg-like. So be thankful for your hair. Deep, I know. 

'You can't part the skin of a sausage,

Or a dad from his fond son and heir.

And you can't part the hair on a bald-headed man,

For there'll be no parting there.'

- Billy Bennett